Down

I feel like I'm drowning in a pit of shit.

Chants of "ifs" keep replaying in my mind.

If only I didn't drive the car and have let mom driven it. I had this tugging not to drive. I wasn't confident. But I went ahead.

To prove myself wrong and to build my own self-absorbed confidence.

I should have listened to my sixth sense.

Then the car would not have been knocked by that damn irresponsible cowardly bitch who ran off after I honked her for about 10 seconds.

I should have driven the car forward. Or maybe, I shouldn't have reversed it in the first place just because my mom said I should.

A feeling of morose regret keeps tugging, plucking the discordant cord of my soul.

I am gravely disturbed.

What if we can't find that damned girl? What if the car number plate which I saw was wrong?? I didn't quite manage to catch the 2nd digit. It fell on the blindspot.

Why am I so damn darn incompetent?

I tried so hard to shake off this feeling of regret. I tried to divert my attention. I tried to laugh it off. I tried to cover it up with anger and being obsessively authoritative when I made my complain to the respective college that she is studying in; demanding that they help me find her.

It's still there.

That damned, hovering shadow of the emotion which burns through your soul with unseen, unforgiving fiery eyes.

As long as that damage is still on the car, as long as I have not found that bitch, as long as I have not repaired the car, I don't know if I can bring myself out of this pit.

Joseph fell into the pit only to be molded into something greater.

Will this experience of mine be the same?

Burst of Duets

What's with sudden bursts of duets?

First we've got Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat with Lucky

And after that we've got James Morrison and Nelly Furtardo with Broken Strings.

Now, I found out there's Jon McLaughlin and Beyonce with Smack/Smash Into You.

The best part??

They all sound almost the same.

Isn't life "wonderfully colourful and diverse"?

Marathon Nap

I can't believe I slept from 6.30 pm right until 12 am.

It must be the squid.

First, I went super crazy.

And then I got tired on the way home because all the energy was used up.

When I got home, well mom, as usual dragged me all over the place.

After all the dragging, I just went to sleep.

About the weekend, well, I can't quite remember.

Except the fact that I keep going to KL.

Life is Fun now!!!

Let me know if there's any outing going on.

Like Karaoking. Lol!!

It's The Last Day!!!

Yay!!!!!

But it doesn't help that I suck in pool now. Just because I stopped playing for a year. Everything was wrong. My hands were sticky, I didn't use my elbow properly, I was too tall from the heels ["Debble, you need to bend lower... lower... Ok, it sounds WRONG... so I did not.]

Anyway, I realised that I'm quite emotionless these days.

What is the point of having emotions when you can laugh all day??

Yup. New Motto.

Yes, last day, I get to play more squash!!!

I'm better at squash compared to tennis. That's because I'm too effing blur for tennis still.

Need to  be more alert.

I realised something.

I never realised how fucking dodgy I was last time until I finally took a look at my facebook pictures.

Gosh.

I need to do something.

Minus Paris Hilton's virus, thank you.

I Got Caught

I woke up in the middle of the night only to find the lights in the hall were turned on.

Usually, all the lights are turned off except for the garage light.

So I decided to go out and take a look. Even the door to the dining room is opened!!

Oh well, must be the nocturnal mother/early bird father doing some stuff in the kitchen.

I wanted to go back to sleep really badly.

"DEBBLE!!!!! Is that you? Are you awake?"

I was forced to open the room door again. "Yea?"

"Wanna play tennis??"

I was trying so hard to avoid the topic of playing tennis; I have to wake up at 6 freaking a.m.!!!

"Me?? Tennis??" HAHAHA.

"I'm giving you no choice, you're coming to play with us. Wake your sister up now."

I happily went back to sleep. It's 6 freaking a.m. anyway. And it's a Sunday!!

Unfortunately, at 6.30 am, the dad's booming voice was at the door which woke my sister up and he ordained that I go too. And my sister slapped me on the arm; forcing me to go brush my teeth first. Gah. Why is it always me first? Just because she is freaking working doesn't mean that I'm not tired too. It's so much more tiring to study than to work!!

If I had not been such a nosey snooper, I wouldn't have been caught, I wouldn't have to go to play tennis and get tortured and torn away from my plushy bed.

And so we played. And I played quite well!! =D After not touching the racquet for like 5 years?? Yeah. But they were mostly parabolas since I usually don't do a full swing. [When I was a beginner, I had a history of hitting the ball over the fence and into the palace grounds when I did those horrible parabola full swings. The bad habit somehow stayed on.]

The highlight of the game was listening/watching those group of old people doing tai chee nearby. IT WAS HILARIOUS!!! They were doing slow motion tai chee to..... well, emo ballads. Celine Dion and Barbara Streisand. Not bad. Because I witnessed them fighting once because they complained that they cannot stand their boring instructor with their lame yi yi er er whatever shit chant that they usually do.

To my amazement, out of the blue, Flo Rida's Low started playing. And they actually 'danced' to it!!! HAH! It was hilarious crazy. They were like robotic cartoons dancing to the tunes with their lame almost-aerobic steps.

[I have a grudge against them because I used to hate their stupid yi yi er tape recording when I used to play tennis last time. I hear it every freaking morning and it is usually blaring in my ears!]

That was the game. After that, we went to church... and... I loved the singing, because I get to really strain my vocal cords!! But... I slept off during sermon.

"Debble, you were sound asleep as a bunny."

It was that bad. I really slept off for about 45 minutes. I usually still listen to the speaker but it's the usual, "in one ear and out the next" mode. But I'm still aware of what is being spoken. But I really slept off that morning. [To my amazement, the mother was happily laughing away and started teasing me for being lazy; sleeping in church just because I, for the first time actually went to play tennis in the morning.]

Oh well.

But that evening, was awesome. We went to this tennis shop in DU and it was brilliant!!! We bought a new pro racquet and re-stringed the other two. And the mom bought a squash racquet. Well, in some meagre effort to lose weight after the food binge spree that we had for the past few days [just because it was her birthday week].

I think I'm hooked to tennis now. But I'll probably steal the mommy's racquet to try out squash too!

Cheers.